What's Saving My {Winter} Life
Or the time I share some big life changes
Welcome. In case you’re new here, I’m Caitlin, a writer of all sorts of things—fiction, life, the occasional poem—but last year on The Time Given I often shared how I was spending my days amidst grief, infertility, and midlife. Sometimes it was slow stories inspired by my daily life, other times it was prayers & poetry. Then I found myself quiet as life shifted in a big way. I’m hoping as 2025 progresses, I’ll start working out what sort of space I want The Time Given to be. So, join me for a little life update today, and stick around as I continue writing about home, hobbies, garden spaces, and the goodness of the Lord.
Hello dear friends,
It’s been awhile since I’ve shared some stories on here, but the last eight months have been a doozy. So here I am with a little life update in the form of a what’s saving my life post.
These days, the thing getting me through winter is that in three months, we’re embarking on an adventure—I’m leaving the classroom and we’re moving across the country.
The TL:DR1 version is that last August, my husband accepted a new job, one we had been praying about for over year.
Somehow, we knew right away this was our next adventure before he was even officially offered the job. You see, last summer, after years of infertility, I also found out I’d probably never have biological children. It’s still a grief I’m working through, but at the same time, my diagnosis2 felt like a bit of a relief. We’d been praying for babies for over a decade—while I’d been working a job I didn’t love mostly for really good insurance to help us with treatments. On the heels of my diagnosis came an out of the blue job offer for my husband: a Department of Defense position working with the Army unit/job he’d been assigned to while he was in the military.
The only caveat—we have to live near an Army post.
We said yes without any hesitation.
Because in the midst of our years of grief, the Lord has been faithful, and we knew without a shred of doubt, this was an answer to years of prayers.3
Saying yes though hasn’t been all ease because it meant spending a lot of time apart—he’s been in North Carolina since October while I’m still in Illinois finishing my teaching year. I could have quit, but I’m the type of person to finish the race and I knew the Lord was asking me to stay. In fact, I ended up with the opportunity to mentor a student teacher this spring and was offered a contract teaching job back at a local University for a night class. So as much as I wanted to be in North Carolina, it was clear I was supposed to stay here for just a little bit longer.
However, within a few weeks of my husband accepting the job, our new adventure started to fall into place and by Thanksgiving, we’d bought a house in North Carolina in a beautiful neighborhood that I visited over Christmas which was when I saw it in person for the first time. I still can’t wrap my head around how fast everything moved in the fall, and how we’re even living this dual life right now except that the Lord is good.
He has worked so much out over these eight months that I’m still processing. I have no doubt I’ll write about it when I have the brain capacity because this whole midlife move also means I am leaving the classroom—probably for good.
This winter, I’ve found myself working through our Illinois home as I prep for selling it, thankful for the healing space it has been these last four years, and I can’t stop returning to the idea of home and garden spaces and healing places (while I also reread LOTR.) While I don’t quite know what the next year or next half of life holds for me vocation wise, I know I’ll have some time to sit with my words. And I hope it brings more talks of home and hobbies and the things I am choosing to do with the time given to me.
This winter has been unlike any other, and while in years past I’ve dreaded the season, I’ve found myself embracing this one, thankful for my hard seasons because without them, there would be no growth in my heart or my faith or my life. So much of my own gardening experiences has played out literally in my life these past years that I don’t think it’s a coincidence I planted my first garden when I did. The Lord knew this little hobby would become a beautiful metaphor for the life set before me.
And so, while I might not have a garden at Loreshire this year, The Lore Homely House in North Carolina is a beautiful blank space waiting to be planted.
A few other things saving my life this winter are:
The new season of Severance. I grew up before the era of binge watching, and while I love a good TV series binge, I forgot how much I truly love having to wait a week for the next episode. That delay of gratification makes the episodes so much better. And goodness, this season is GOOD.
Tony’s Chocolonely. If I’m remembering right, my good friend Laura introduced me to this brand years and years ago, but I live in what I’ve dubbed a food desert and promptly forgot about it. I rediscovered the brand when I visited NC over Christmas break and have since realized I can find some of my favorite flavors at my local Target. Delicious Belgian style chocolate doing good for the world—I’m sold for life.
A quick trip to the Wizarding World with my best friend. Granted, it was in December, but it gave me just the rejuvenation I needed. And now I want to visit Hogsmeade every Christmas.
Cooking my way through my cookbook collection. I have a slight obsession with cookbooks and love reading them—but I usually make one or two recipes before I stick it on my shelf and forget about it (or only cook those two recipes over and over again.) This year I set a goal to cook 10 recipes from a single cookbook each month, and I love the variety it’s bringing to my life. It’s been a little tough since I’m on my own and THERE’S SO MUCH FOOD but I don’t mind eating leftovers. And I’m slowly growing my list of favorite recipes!
Growing my own little sprouts on the kitchen counter. I’d be lying if I said I was okay not having a garden this summer, but the timing of our move doesn’t really give me space to do so (plus, I’m dismantling some of my newer beds to bring with me.) So, instead I’m dreaming about a longer garden season in the south and trying my hand at sprouts and microgreens inside! I’m not sure why I haven’t attempted these before having lived in the Midwest for so long, but the green is just what I’ve needed during this very ungreen winter.
My own little mermaid story. November was a hard month for many reasons, but I channeled some of that hard energy into a middle grade story inspired by Irish merrow myths and submitted it to an Indie anthology. I found out last month my story was accepted and will be published in the anthology next year. I can’t wait to share all about it in the coming months.
What’s been saving your life this winter season, friends? Share your joys and your good in the comments (or even the hard…because there’s space for that, too.)
I’m Caitlin, a writer, hobbyist, and creative who believes in the power of story, and that things like nature, wonder, faith, grief, hope, and art are worth our time and attention. I write stories for young readers centered around the themes of grief, belonging, loss, hope, and found families, which I share in my newsletter Lost in Story, while also exploring them in my own life here on The Time Given. My writing here will always be free to read, but it does take time and heart space to write. Please consider supporting the work I do by giving a one-time or monthly donation, or by subscribing to my weekly writing.
Too long didn’t read
Primary ovarian insufficiency or premature ovarian failure; not quite early menopause but close enough
And what I think will someday be the basis of a memoir I pen
So happy for you two. Esther 4:14
Aaahhh! I'm so excited for you! We will miss you terribly, but goodness, how can we be *too* sad when you're chasing your amazing dreams! 🥰🥰🥰